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You are beautiful still

It takes you a whole lot more than the next girl to get dressed because you can never find something that sits well on you. Well like how the magazine says it should look. And you are constantly wondering why no one has yet discovered the secret to making clothes that are ideal for your body shape. Here’s to learning that this is a sentiment shared by most females big and small. Filling our bra cups with chicken fillets so we look like a natural DD. Dancing in the mirror. Singing in the shower. Claiming all the hot single rock stars as husbands and boycotting their CDs when they get married. Here’s to shaving off our hair coz it’s the new thing only to wake up the following morning and long Brazilian wave is in. Here’s to veering wildly off our rails just to catch the hot guy’s attention only to realise that the stunt put him off more than turned him on. And then the struggle of finding the right foundation for your skin tone after years of prancing around ghost like. Don’t stress others just learnt to wing it and by so doing look like they’ve mastered the art of self-confidence.
Here’s to that first sip of the good stuff that signified coolness. The light headedness that followed. The sista who held your hair back as you almost hurled your gut out in the dingy toilet stall as the queue grew longer outside. The countless mileage on your walk-of-shameter . Countless on the road Saturday breakfasts in Friday night’s outfit. Here’s to anxiously waiting for that time of the month because you were naughty and the sighs of relief that went with its arrival. Here’s to maintaining a healthy lifestyle by exercising regularly. Countless nights spent dreaming whilst wide awake. Choosing the stairs when you could easily get on the escalator and constructively use the time to scroll down your Facebook. Watching your calories all week because you saving the count for that de-virgined daiquiri come Friday night. Here’s to persevering with the yoga class even when all we’ve mastered is bringing our hands to heart centre for namaste and then catching up with some girlfriends over chocolate cake after class. Catching the cute guy checking you out. And thanks to that guy who breaks a heart because he’s given us an excuse to come together and binge on ice cream and all things nice. And that guy whose love you thought you’d die without. He gone, you here, we see you!

Here’s to cherishing that you are a creator of life. You bear the scars and sport a pouch of belly fat to show for it. Here’s to watching him sleep, who knew this could be fun. Here’s to that first worry line, well no need to worry, we don’t want to encourage more lines. You are beautiful still. You can actually do what you spend the greater part of your life doubting you could. You have been bestowed the responsibility of a little person. To the love that spills over and out. Here’s to giving, giving and giving even when you think there’s nothing left to give. Realising that as you mature your priorities and desires change. That it’s okay to love and let love. That vulnerability isn’t always a weakness, where you are vulnerable is where your strength dwells. Discovering that gravity actually exists, of course you needed confirmation from your breasts. And shame on that bastard who tried his hand at boxing matches with you. Though he broke your nose he strengthened your resolve and courage. Here’s to the day you realised that you can walk away and maintain your dignity. For realising that sometimes it takes much more courage and wisdom to walk away than to stay. And learning that walking away is closing a chapter so that a new one can commence. For love is like a rainbow, it’s always there after the storm. Finding yourself. Coming into your own. Falling in love with you, the girl you are not who they want you to be. Even though you are older you are beautiful still, perhaps a lot more. Learning that you can never truly love another without loving yourself. And can you believe that in that place of self-doubt and regret now resides self-love and hope. Where there was once fear lies courage now. Here’s to learning that there is a fine line between being humble and lacking self-esteem. Realising that being humble keeps you grounded and lacking self-esteem prevents you from soaring. Here’s to accepting that you are different. Acknowledging and accepting that you can only be the best you and that is enough. Here’s to being knocked down countless times and getting back up just as much coz there’s only a few things that you can take lying on your back *wink*.

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